Nancy Pelosi's Second Crusade

Speaker Pelosi, flush with the ephemeral success of the "Death to America as we Know It" health care legislation, has weighed into national security matters in an effort to burnish her chances for a Noble Peace Prize. The Speaker, seeking to build upon her post-partisian coalition on the domestic front, spoke to the Arab American Friendship League on Sunday afternoon in Flint, Michigan.

During her lengthy talk about the religion of peace, Speaker Pellosi called upon Joint Chiefs Chairman General Casey to award Major Nadil Malik Hasan a Purple Heart, recognizing that this fine officer and gentleman was severely wounded in combat against his nation's enemy - the United States Army.

General Casey responded immediately by cautioning the Speaker on her apparent rush to judgment, in concluding that Major Hasan was fighting an enemy, as opposed to the PC hypothesis that he just snapped, due to the pressure of the Phillies losing in six games.